Social Graces Saturday

Social Graces Saturday – Holding Doors

Welcome to Social Graces Saturday.  Today’s subject is “Hold the door!  Is chivalry dead?”  The other day someone said to me “Why is it that no one ever opens doors for anyone anymore”?  I replied, “People hold doors for me all the time, but I also hold doors for others too”.  It made me start to think.  Can it be true?  Is chivalry really dead?

I truly believe in the law of attraction.  We get what we put into the world.  Now, I also know that some women really don’t want a man holding a door for them.  They feel that they are equals and they can open their own doors.  I get it.  I am woman hear me roar.  I’m all for roaring.  Believe me, I am.  However, I think that a man showing me respect is different than feeling like I am not capable of doing things for myself.  But that is just me.   I bring home the bacon and fry it up in a pan.  However, wanting to be treated like a lady doesn’t diminish my bacon handling abilities.

When a man holds open the door I just feel like his mama raised him right.  If he opens the car door for me when we get into the car, well, I have to admit, that makes my heart skip a beat.  Then if he has me wait so that he can open the car door for me when I get out of the car…he’s getting lucky tonight.  Ha ha, ok no, maybe not, but it definitely increases his chances (wink wink).

My point is that manners are impressive.  A man going out of his way to treat a woman like a lady is impressive.  Especially in today’s fast paced digital world, where so many of life’s small interactions are cold and impersonal.  It’s so easy to forget how important our daily interactions with people can be.  When we forget how to interact with each other, the little things like holding the door for someone else gets lost in the shuffle.  Now, I don’t expect a man to pull a Sir Walter Raleigh, and put his overcoat across a puddle so I don’t get my feet wet and dirty.  It’s abundantly clear though that Sir Walter was a man who knew the power of chivalry.

Some of you might be thinking that I am a little high maintenance to expect a man to hold the door for me.   Maybe you are right, I don’t know.  I just know that the Queen Bee tells me that sometimes you just have to straighten your crown and remind them who they are dealing with.  Amen Queenie.

I know women who won’t get out of the car until a man opens the door for them.  All I can say is that I wouldn’t pull that unless I was willing to spend my evening in the car.  My significant other would turn around and say “are you coming in”?  That would totally backfire on me I have to tell you.  I think there is a difference in carrying yourself with enough confidence to elicit chivalry and demanding it.  Demanding it cheapens it for me.  Again, that is just what is right for me.  If a man is using his best manners when interacting with me I am impressed that he is making the effort to treat me with respect.  See the difference?

I think it all goes back to the law of attraction.  You get what you give.  Treat people with respect, and you will get respect in return.  For instance, if you hold the door open for an elderly person or a harried mother who is just trying to wrangle her bunch into the grocery store, that kindness will be given it back to you tenfold.  If people aren’t treating you with respect or if no one ever holds the door for you…try holding the door for others and I promise the universe will rise up and return the favor.  So until next time… mind your manners, practice the law of attraction, and as always stay glamorous.

 

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